If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize