PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Farmville is her only friend.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
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