I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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