Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
