Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
