You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
