If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.