Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
