How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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