it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize