I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize
