Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
