I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize