i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
