we have officially lost it.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
