I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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