just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize