I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
