all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.