i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
they're like a gay fantastic four
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I am available for nakedness
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
