I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Randomize
