Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize