Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
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