the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
