so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
