There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
