"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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