So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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