I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
