so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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