I hate your face
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I think my moral compass just broke
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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