ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Randomize
