I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
