dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
