I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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