just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
