OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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