now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
