we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
