Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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