theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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