I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize