I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
