Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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