You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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