We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
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