Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
