Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
