So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
