yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
