The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
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I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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