you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
