Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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